Wednesday, August 4, 2010

mastitis

Just tried to nurse again - by that I mean, threw myself into hell and Chinese like torture. My baby is the only one who can help me, but he's the one who hurts me too.
There it is; the reason i haven't posted. Would LOVE to say i've been blissfully enjoying my miracle baby, but no. Since Sunday I've been sick in bed with a fever and excruciating pain. Seriously??!! Going on 4 days of fever--- round the clock tylonol helps but of course doesn't cure. The crap antibiotic I got Mon ate thru my stomach and now I have another ulcer. An ulcer but no relief yet...
I thought I wouldn't post until I wasn't feverish because it makes me so negative. I had no idea it would be this long and nothing would change.
Every time I look at Trey I smile. He is precious and I know by pure laws of nature and science he shouldn't be here. That in itself overwhelms me. I'm so grateful. I'm so sad that I apparently make a super long cord that doesn't mix well with active Haught babies, one that the modern OB community knows nothing about so there is no solution except miracles or adoption. Don't misunderstand, I have always thought adoption was an amazing and sacred thing. But to be able to create a baby but not keep it alive inside is so depressing. I turned my heart wholly toward my family before Jackson was born and it's been a rough road of shattered hopes.
Now I am soooooo blessed to have my baby! But I can't care for him (or my other kids) the way I want to. It's a mess over here! From the house to the kid's breath to my crap broken boobs. I just want to nurse my preemie so he'll have the best chance of growing and staying healthy. Thank goodness for all the pumped milk from the hospital. It's quickly vanishing though!
Three weeks ago we were cheering when Trey drank 3 mls. Now he's wanting about 60mls! Go Trey!!!!
Sad thing, he may have to go without me... and I am sooooo sad about it. So discouraged right now.
Didn't know it was possible to feel like this on the foot of such, ironically, "overflowing" joy.
He's crying again - apparently nursing both sides - the affected one twice, and offering a small bottle after wasn't enough food for him...!

9 comments:

Robin said...

Kelly, I am sorry about the mastitis. My siser-n-law went through that too. She said it took her about five days to break the fever. I hope that helps you may only have one day left. Don't be discouraged. I know you must be exhausted. Caidgen and Ami are welcome to spend Friday night with us if it helps at all. I'm so sorry I wish I could do more.

JennC said...

Oh I'm sorry Kelly. I've had mastitis 4 times total with the girls. Not fun AT ALL!! I'm so sorry the antibiotic isn't an option. You are Super Mom to be even functioning without the relief. I hope it goes away soon and you can continue to nurse Trey. Glad to hear he's continuing to thrive. Hang in there!

Jill and Cameron said...

Oh Kelly that just plain stinks!! I hope you're feeling better soon. If Ami and Caidgen want to come over and play so you can sleep a bit just call okay?!? If there is anything you need at all you know my number. Take care of YOU! :)

Kathleen said...

Kelly, I had mastitis twice with our baby girl. First time, I got an antibiotic shot in the hip. Several months later when the second time came, I tried eating raw garlic cloves (like, six of them!) pressed, mixed with olive oil, and put on bread as a spread with lots and lots of cheddar cheese to offset the strong taste. In between bites, I drank gallons of milk it seemed. It was definitely spicy and I had garlic breath for two or three days afterward, but the mastitis cleared up within 12 hours and without a visit to the doctor. Eating plain yogurt with wonderful probiotics also did wonders for strengthening my immune system. To this day, I still eat all natural yogurt each day. Of course, you would want to consider speaking to a nurse or doctor before hitting yourself up with half a bulb of garlic and all the yogurt, but I thought I'd tell you right away so that you might have a chance to save your mommy milk makers. I'll email you my phone number in case you have any other questions about this home remedy that saved me.

Mindy said...

How frustrating! I have no advice, but we are still thinking about and praying for all of you.

Lauren Porter said...

Mastitis! BLAH!!!! I had it for weeks with Madelyn and 2 rounds of antibiotics cause it would not go away! I feel so bad for you! It truly sucks. I pumped allot cause it was so painful. My doctor often reminded me that breast milk from a bottle is still breast milk. Due to problems with latching and mastitis I pumped for the first 4 weeks of both babies lives and then after all was healed and well with me and baby we went to the lactation specialist. They latched again and nursing was no big deal. Pumping saved my ability to feed my child breast milk. Good luck and I pray for some healing breasts!

Bri said...

OUCH. I never had actual mastitis, but I did have a bit of overfull boobies, and they hurt terribly. Can you prop yourself on your knees yet? What used to help me was laying her on her back, me on my knees, so that my breast was hanging down. I don't know why, but it drained some ducts that didn't always get drained or pumped out.

Patty said...

Kelly, so sorry to hear you are in so much pain! I too had a severe case of mastitis with Erin. She was such a bitty thing it seemed she just couldn't nurse enough to give me relief. I also could not take the antibiotics. I just used tylenol and I pumped after she nursed to try to relieve some of the pressure. I also stand in a warm shower and massage the affected area. It hurt like nobody's business but seemed to help. I hope you get some relief soon so you can move on from this and throughly enjoy those kids. Luv you!

Anonymous said...

oooh, kelly, i have to talk with you about this. Let me know when you have a few minutes...and if I can bring you anything. I may be able to help with the milk problem.love you!
Mares